Back to that December.



That December was epic before everything started to change drastically. I never once regretted what I got to do or what I wanted to do because it's things I wanted to do initially isn't it? I probably regret because I was too slow in finding out things which I think it might help me to save some of my situations. Watching everything gone in front of me, doesn't make me feel better. Watching the things I do to others, hurts me, it doesn't make me feel better. All these months have been a searching for an answer, searching for a better way out. Hearing what I thought I would never heard, doesn't make me feel better. Trust me for this, it's at least x2 of what I actually said out.

Then again, it got nothing to do with anyone. However, do watch, because you'll probably get to see me fall. Words can't meant much. See for yourself in this case. Of course, for the good that I done, it can't be seen but felt. However, if it means nothing, then that is how the way it got to be, the so called I've done nothing. I'm totally fine with it because I went one whole big round just to get back here is what I wanted to do, it's not others anyway. This point of time, no point of explaining, things left unsaid. I respect that decision and turned my backed off and walked away again.

Before you really start playing out the hell of others, get the facts right why all these are happening at the start. The one who gave you shits is me, not them. You can vent it out on me not them. Seeking for understanding doesn't help. So why don't you just watch me suffer in many more ways than what you already knew sooner or later? I didn't keep my ego up, I didn't keep my guards up, I leave it open because what are all those for when there is nothing more I can keep? Oh maybe these are just bullshits huh. Well, that's all already.

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